Disclaimers

I guess that I should be up front and put a couple of facts here: 

1. I *know* I'm only 25, that I have LOTS of time before I have to worry about running out of time.
2. I *know* that we have only been trying for 4 cycles so far (this will be our 5th) and others have been trying far, far longer than we have.
3. I *know* that if we just relax and stop thinking about it, it will probably happen.

But, with that, is this:

1. I feel like I was born ready for kids.  
2. My miscarraige turned a switch on inside of me that I have yet not been able to find the off button.  
3. Next month will mark 3 years since the only time I have been pregnant.  
4. June this year marks 3 years since I lost my twins.
5. As a result of 3 and 4, it *feels* like it is longer than 4 cycles that I have been waiting, because technically I have been waiting almost 3 years.
6. I know several women with fertility issues, and I'm terrified that with my history with Mr T and Mr J, this is something that, quite conceivably could one day be me.
7. Trying to relax and stop thinking about it, is a bit like trying to get a kid to relax and stop thinking about Christmas.

I guess the reason I am saying all of this is to put the things I say into context.  When I'm whinging that I feel like I am never going to get pregnant, it's in this context.  

It's the head constantly fighting with the heart.  The only question is, which one will win?